Prayer To Overcome Fear Of Losing A Baby
9 Ways to Overcome Fear and Live with Courage — Purpose Fairy
Overcome fear by realizing that all fear is nothing but a state forgetfulness — forgetting your Truth, forgetting your Worth, forgetting your Power, forgetting your Wisdom, forgetting your Purpose, and forgetting your Source.
Fear has no power of its own. But it can feed with the power we give to it. And today we will learn how to stop giving fear power over us. Today we will discover 9 ways to overcome fear and live with courage.
1. Open yourself up to this idea that fear is nothing but an illusion and that Love is the only thing that’s real
The first step to overcome fear is by realizing that all fear is nothing but a state forgetfulness — forgetting your Truth, forgetting your Worth, forgetting your Power, forgetting your Wisdom, forgetting your Purpose, and forgetting your Source.
A Course in Miracles talks about this so beautifully:
“Nothing and everything cannot coexist. To believe in one is to deny the other. Fear is really nothing and love is everything. Whenever light enters darkness, the darkness is abolished.” ~ A Course in Miracles
As well as the New Testament,
“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of self-confidence.” ~ 2 Timothy 1:7
And John Lennon:
“There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance.” ~ John Lennon
“Dwelling on past irritations or hurts perpetuates them and creates a vicious circle that serves to confirm these negative emotions. The circle can be broken by starting now to revise anything that you no longer wish to sustain in your world.” ~ Neville Goddard
Revise anything that you no longer wish to sustain in your world by spending at least 5 minutes each day recreating the scenes of the past. Change what was once dark, painful, and fearful, into something wonderful, healthy, and inspiring. By doing so, your present and future life will be built on the foundation of those newly created healthy memories.
Don’t let your fearful mind bully you into thinking you have to dwell on past hurts and irritations and carry these heavy weights with you wherever you go.
“By revising the past, you rid yourself of any effect it may have on your future. Revision is truly the key, which can be used to unlock the doors that have kept you trapped in a particular state.” ~ Neville Goddard
3. Center yourself, in Yourself
Your body is a lot a house – if the owner of the house goes wandering from place to place – leaving the doors and windows of the house opened, thieves and burglars will effortlessly walk in to take advantage of the situation. And the same happens when you are Not at Home in Your Body.
When you are not being fully grounded, present and engaged in your body, you become an easy target for fear, doubt, anxiety, jealousy, anger, and all the other thieves and mind burglars who are eager to steal your joy, peace, and wellbeing.
“Be where you are. Look around. Just look, don’t interpret. See the light, shapes, colors, textures. Be aware of the silent presence of each thing. Be aware of the space that allows everything to be.” ~ Eckhart Tolle
Center yourself, in Yourself.
Treat your body with the love, dignity, and respect it truly deserves. And don’t let your fearful thoughts trick you into thinking you need to go outside yourself to find yourself. Always remember that all that you need is already Within Yourself!
4. Live each day in wonder
Stay open and receptive to the magic and wonder present all around you. Be as a little child – curious, present, thankful, and joyful.
Pay full attention to what’s unfolding in front of you.
Take nothing for granted.
Each day is a gift. Each moment is a new life. Each breath is a blessing.
Acknowledge the beauty that surrounds you – the trees, the clouds, the stars, the flowers, the smells, the colors, the people… Acknowledge all the beauty and magic this world has to offer, and give your loving thanks for all of it.
5. Dwell in thankfulness
I have always loved this quote from the great mystic, Meister Eckhart:
“If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.” – Meister Eckhart
To give thanks to all that life has to offer you, no matter if you perceive it as good, bad, ugly, or beautiful, is to melt all fear from your mind and heart make room in your life for Love.
A fearful mind knows no thankfulness. But a mind filled with love is a mind that knows how powerful gratitude is.
Get into the habit of saying ‘thank you’ to everything and everyone. And know that by doing so, not only will you bring love and peace back into your life, but you will also realize that nothing in this life happens To you, it all happens For you.
6. Time alone in silence
“God’s one and only voice are Silence.” ~ Herman Melville
Each day, seek to spend at least 5 to 10 minutes alone in silence. (If you live in a busy home and you can’t find a quiet space, go to the bathroom. Close the door after you and don’t let anyone disturb until you have reconnected with the Peace and Love that’s present in the silence of your heart and mind.)
“In quietness and trust shall be your strength.” Isaiah 30:15
Give yourself the gift of silence, and silence will reveal to you the Truth about everything – about Yourself, about Life, about Love, and about fear…
“If you let yourself be blown to and fro, you lose touch with your root. If you let restlessness move you, you lose touch with who you are.” ~ Lao Tzu
7. Fill your Heart with Prayer, and your Soul with Meditation
Fill your Heart with Prayer and your Soul with Meditation. Give your Heart and Soul the nourishment they need to heal your fearful mind and infuse your life with Light and Love.
(To me, prayer isn’t a religious practice, but rather an intimate act of connecting our minds with our Hearts and our Souls with the Life and Love of all things…. While meditation is an act of letting go and surrender so that we can hear our inner guidance and the answer to our prayers…)
“The function of prayer is not to influence God, but rather to change the nature of the one who prays.” ~ Søren Kierkegaard
Always remember that to surrender is not to give your power away, but to take back the Power you once gave away; to surrender is to no longer allow your fearful mind, and insecure ego to decide what’s ‘good’ for you.
Surrender your life constantly to the Higher part of you – surrender to your Soul, surrender to your Truth, surrender to your Light, surrender to your Inner God.
“All real pleasure comes from doing God’s Will. (And God is within yourself. Always remember that – Within yourself, NOT, Outside yourself.) This is because not doing it is a denial of Self.” ~ A Course in Miracles
Fear tells us we are small, unworthy, and insignificant;
Fear tells us we will fail;
Fear tells us we are all alone;
Fear tells us nobody will listen to us;
Fear tells us to hide;
Fear tells us we are nothing…
But that’s just fear.
—And Love Heals—
Love Knows we are love, loved, and loving;
Love Knows we are guided;
Love Knows we are never alone;
Love Knows we are worthy and enough;
Love Knows we are beautiful;
Love Knows we are Powerful beyond measure;
Love Knows we are Wise, Brave, and Courageous…
Love Knows, and fear thinks… Fear lies, and Love Heals.
Overcome fear with Love
Love your darkness into the light.
Love your enemies into friendships.
Love your wounds into wisdom.
Love your past into healing.
Love your sickness into health.
Love all fear into Love.
Love it all… because there is no greater power than Love…
Open yourself up to this idea that fear is nothing but an illusion. And that Love is the only thing that’s real. And let your Love show you how to overcome fear.
A Prayer for When You’re Overwhelmed by Fear
- Hayley DiMarco
- 2017Nov 14
When I was starting college, I set off for the big city of Portland, Oregon, some four-and-a-half hours from my small hometown. I got a cute little studio apartment in an old 1940s hotel, which was conveniently located two blocks from campus.
Happily, I would walk to school every morning and enjoy my time in the sun, but as soon as the sun was locked up for the night, sadly, so was I.
From my fourth-floor window, I could see the darkness bleeding into the streets and invading the souls of the damned who circled the sidewalk in front of my building. At least that’s how I imagined it.Even if I were completely food and starving to death, I would not leave the building after dark to trek the two blocks to the local grocer. It just didn’t make good safety sense. Remember, the safest risk is the one you don’t take.
Yeah, try walking a mile in my brain and see how you feel in the frightmare that is my life. My deep desire to explore the world and live the dream was overwhelmed by mere darkness—but boy, was it overwhelming.
Two years later, I moved to another apartment that was literally behind the grocery store. I could open up my door and run as quickly as my little legs would carry me, through the parking lot and into the safety of the Safeway.
Isn’t it ironic? It really was called Safeway.
The proximity of this store allowed me to take my first steps of emerging into the darkness. Dracula, when he first realized the moon didn’t burn the sun, I was set free to live after six p.m.
My mind is easily drowned in fear, a fly taking a swim in my lemonade, expecting the drink to be sweet but finding out it is deadly. Even so, I used to rely on my fear to protect me. “Do what it says, and everything will be OK.” In the vein of Dory from Finding Nemo, my chant was, “Just keep fearing. Just keep fearing.”
Fear, though, isn’t a loner. No, fear has a BFF she pals around with, and her name is Worry. In fact, some would say Worry is the one who gets Fear all riled up in the first place, and I can attest to that. Many times in my life, Worry has spoken, and Fear has reacted.
I can say I have successfully worried about thieves, fires, natural disasters, rabid dogs, living alone, dying alone, getting cancer, and being kidnapped, raped, and beaten. I’ve worried about just about everything a girl can worry about and more.
Let’s be honest, though; the only success I had at such an endeavor was giving myself an ulcer.In my search for the cure, I read in a book that my worry was the result of my calling God a liar, and I didn’t that idea. I set about finding out how to trust God rather than doubt Him. To do that, I had to know more about Him.
I assigned myself the task of reading His Word and finding out who this God was whom I should trust. As I read, it all started to make sense. If my mother loved me enough to try so hard to protect me, wouldn’t my God do a much better job? Wouldn’t He, too, want only what was best for me? This idea made a lot of sense, and throughout time it gave me a lot of freedom.
I still have to fight the urge to have my passport always ready and the car full of gas in case I need to make a quick getaway my mom always taught me.
(I know, weird, but safety is no laughing matter!) But I try to remember the true story I read about a mom who left her daughter in the care of Hannah Whitall Smith, who said that all the girl did the entire time the mom was gone was fret and worry about her abandoning her.
“She was too afraid to play, too scared to rest,” said Hannah to the mother. Imagine how grieved the mother was to hear her child doubted her and suffered badly from it.
I don’t want to waste my playtime on worry. I want to enjoy where my Father has put me and trust He hasn’t abandoned me. I want to rest and not fret, to trust and not fear.
A Prayer to Overcome Fear
Lord, You are a good Father. Your love and care is endless. You care more about my wellbeing that even I do, no matter how much I worry over it. And you are all powerful – able to protect me completely and fully from anything that might arise. Lord, I confess I forget these truths. I confess I am prone to believe that I am alone and without any protection.
Lord, I know that this is a lie I tell myself, and it only works me up into worry and fear. I repent of that worry and fear now… ultimately, I know it stems from not trusting in Your goodness toward me. Help me believe and live the truth that you are always close, always protecting me, always watching over every step of my life. Thank you Lord for your great love for me.
In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
A Short Prayer for When You're Afraid
God, you haven’t given me a spirit of fear. Come and replace my fear with your power and your love so I may have a sound mind to live each day glorifying you. Amen.
Image Credit: Thinkstock.com
This article is part of our larger Prayers resource meant to inspire and encourage your prayer life when you face uncertain times. Visit our most popular prayers if you are wondering how to pray or what to pray. Remember, the Holy Spirit intercedes for us and God knows your heart even if you can't find the words to pray.
A Daily Morning Prayer
A Prayer for When You're Overwhelmed by Fear
A Prayer for a Broken Heart
A Prayer for Worry
A Prayer for First Thing in the Morning
A Prayer for When You Don't Know What to Do
Hayley DiMarco is the best-selling author of more than 40 books, including her latest release is A Woman Overwhelmed: Finding God in the Messes of Life (Abingdon Press) and its companion Bible study. As the founder of Hungry Planet, DiMarco speaks regularly for women’s groups and events. Hayley, her pastor husband, Michael, and their daughter live outside Nashville.
To learn more about DiMarco, visit her online home www.HayleyDiMarco.com. She can also be found on (hayley.dimarco) and (@hayleydimarco).
How to Overcome Fear of Losing Job? 12 Simple Tips
“A job is a significant part of most of our lives”
We need a job to support our family and to lead a respectable life.
As the job market gets more and more volatile, the fear of losing a job is poisoning the minds of several employees. There are families with a single earning member and the entire family depends on the income of this one earning individual.
Losing a job can mean a great crisis to such individuals. Yet, the fear of losing a job and the anxiety associated with it prevents people from performing well.
1. Self-analyze your skills and abilities:
Many individuals, working in multinational firms and other organizations of equal repute, get so engrossed in their work that they fail to analyze their own capabilities.
They never spend enough time to identify the fields they are good at. They do not understand their plus points or drawbacks. This becomes a problem when they are termed an under performer by the organization because the candidate has nothing to defend himself.
He has never self-assessed his skills and abilities to justify why he is not up to the mark. You need to thus eke out some time to understand yourself.
This will also help you in interviews for other job openings.
2. Check out other job options for you:
Even after you join an organization, allocate an hour or so each day to check out the industry trends.
Check out the other job options available for your qualifications and capabilities. Check out the pay scale for these jobs.
You should also see if there are some additional courses or certifications that will help you to upgrade your position or designation in different organizations.
You may also apply for different jobs and appear for interviews so that you get an idea what is required for the other jobs. You must also keep track of the market trends. This will help you understand whether the field you have chosen is stable or not.
3. Look for an extra source of income:
If you are the only earning member in the family, your income becomes very crucial to the family. You can never afford to lose the job or sit at home idle.
If your job scenario is volatile, opt for additional sources of income. This extra income will add to luxury when you have a job and help to support you if you lose your job.You can look for such jobs on different job portals. If you are working in the IT industry, there are multiple freelancing options for developers, designers and content writers.
You may even opt to start a side business. There are many small scale businesses that help to earn a decent sum of money. You may also check out other online earning options through Affiliate Marketing.
4. Create an inventory:
You need to save a percentage of your money while you are earning. This money will act as an inventory when you are not working.
You need to aptly plan your salary so that you get an opportunity to save a percentage of your income.
For this purpose, you may start a recurring deposit with your bank. It is a great idea if you want a constant saving for yourself.
Ideally, you must save at least the amount of your salary as inventory so that even if you lose the job, you can manage for a month. Job seekers usually manage to get a job within a month’s time.
5. Keep track of the market trends:
There are times when certain sectors of the industry make huge losses. When companies make losses, they try to even it out by reducing their workforce.
This is a common trend and if you know the market situation, you can take the right measures at the right time. You need to have a basic knowledge of how your company is performing.
It will help you understand whether your company can afford to keep you for long.
If the company is making huge losses, you must start looking for other options before it is too late. A step at the right time always helps.
6. Make wise investments:
Individuals who succeed in life are usually backed by wise investments. When you have money to invest, using it to purchase assets that will give you huge returns in future is the best strategy.
Property is one of the best investments as they are bound to gain value with time. The returns are high when you purchase property.
The property prices have increased at a really fast pace. You may also invest in gold as it is also a great asset that offers huge returns.You may also check out the different investment schemes in banks and financial organizations. They have mutual funds and other schemes that offer huge returns.
You need to make sure you read the offer document properly before you invest your hard earned money.
7. Take care of your health:
Individuals who ignore their health tend to regret later. Health is a valuable asset and should be treated one. In an attempt to earn more money, individuals slog day in and day out. As time passes, due to lack of rest and excessive exertion, your body gets weak.
Your immune system also grows weak and you get ill easily. Ill health makes you take leaves at office and prevents you from performing your best. If you fail to perform well, the organisation may consider replacing you with some other capable candidate.
You need to understand that without health you cannot achieve anything in life. You must make sure that you get a proper amount of sleep. You should also allocate some time for routine exercise so that you stay fit. Avoid skipping meals or eating junk food.
Give your body the required rest so that it can perform with the same vigour always.
Companies want their employees to be smart and proactive. If you lack confidence or do not take any initiative, the company may regard you as a poor candidate who is not fit for the particular job.In any field, an ideal candidate possesses the following qualities and you need to inculcate them in yourself too.
People gauge your level of confidence through your body language. If you stammer, sweat or pluck your hair while talking to individuals, it reflects your lack of confidence. Lack of confidence prevents you to speak out what you feel. Organisations prefer individuals who are outspoken and reflect confidence through their speech.
2. Good communication skills:
A good communication skill is one of the prerequisites of working in a huge organisation. You need to have the command over the language you converse in.
You should be able to convey what you think in a clear and effective way. There should be no miscommunication when you speak. Clarity in speech and written communication plays a vital role.
Individuals working in companies should be able to send effective emails that convey the message correctly.
3. Willingness to take initiatives:
You need to take steps to correct or optimise work methods in an organisation. If you need to take some initiatives, you should be bold enough to go and do it without any hesitation.
Individuals who are hesitant or lack the proactiveness do not prove to be great resources in the long run.
Organisations prefer individuals who have the courage to step up and take an initiative or correct a mistake.
4. Leadership qualities:
If you wish to progress in your career, you need to have some leadership qualities. Very few people manage to be good leaders in their organisations. A leader usually shoulders the responsibility of the entire team. He has to make sure that all the tasks by team members are done correctly.
He should also be able to guide his team members when they face any kind of problem in their tasks. They should also have good speaking skills and should be able to motivate team members so that the tasks are completed properly. You need a good rapport with the team if you wish to lead the team.
When you work in an organisation, you need to be well maintained. You need to work with a group of people and so you need to make sure you maintain hygienic habits.
You must carry tissues and hand sanitizers with you as it helps you stay hygienic. If you have the habit of smoking, make sure that you use a mouth freshener when you go back to office.
Always go to the office well dressed and do not litter your surroundings.
These above suggestions may seem trivial but they do matter a lot when you have to work in an organisation. Individuals who ignore these basic facts tend to suffer later. Working in an organisation and retaining the job is no easy task. It is a consistent effort and only when you put in your 100% will you lose the fear of losing the job that earns you your daily bread.
10 Tips On How To Overcome The Fear Of Losing Someone
You are scared of losing your partner and it makes you give yourself away more than you should. You start to see how your life would be miserable without him and that you need him under any conditions.
This mindset can become really depressing at times and it makes you forget about how valuable you are as a person and that you’re an individual who can do really well all by herself.
Of course, I’m not trying to tell you to leave him so you can experiment if you could live without him, I’m just giving you ways in which you can prevent yourself from thinking about it so much that even the most simple thought about it makes you cry.
1. Realize that your fear is quite normal
First of all, let’s get this clear—your fear is something normal and if you love him, your reaction to the thought of losing him and the sadness you feel are normal reactions. The problem starts the moment when it starts to consume you.
When you can’t be happy while being with your partner because of the constant bug in your head, your relationship can’t progress in the way it should. You’re stuck with that idea and you simply can’t let go of it.
Remember that the fear of losing a loved one is normal and we all experience it, but you don’t need to worry about it to the point where you stop enjoying the present moment!
2. Put your partner in second place
You should be your own priority. You should never give up something you love because of him and you shouldn’t be dedicating all of your time and energy into the relationship.
You need it for yourself! With the urge for self-improvement, you will completely forget about your fear because you will be the one who is the most important person in your life. Even if your partner does leave you, you’ll know that you didn’t give up on your dreams for him.
By the way, this doesn’t mean to be selfish and to forget about him or your relationship, to never have time for him, etc, it just means that you will be more aware of the fact that even if he leaves, you will still have a fulfilled life.
3. Spend time alone
This goes together with the previous tip. When you spend more time with yourself, you will get a sense of independence. You will know that your happiness isn’t in the hands of someone else, but rather in your own. Simply relax and stop running after him.
4. Write it down
Every time you feel the fear creeping in, take a notebook and write it down, as I promise you that at some point it will start to look silly to you. By doing this you will get more conscious of the fear and you will recognize it when it comes.
Write it down simply to know what situation triggered this fear and how to avoid these situations.
For example, if you’re home alone and your toxic thoughts are consuming your mind, you can sit down and write, then after, forget about that topic and set your mind on thinking about a project you have at work and how to deal with it or put on a movie that makes you laugh your heart out. These things helped me a lot.
5. Talk with your partner
Because I’m speaking here personal experience, I know for sure that communication can save you from a lot of nights spent crying. By talking with your partner, he will know how much the relationship means to you and that you appreciate him. He can even reassure you how something that won’t happen and it will make you feel at ease.
6. Realize that you can’t control everything
If someone’s going to leave, they will leave. You can’t keep them by your side if they don’t want to be there. Why would you even want someone that in your life? There is nothing they can give you anymore. Let them leave.
It may be hard and it may leave you heartbroken, but no one will be happy if your partner is talking about breaking up and all you do is cry and scream to convince him to stay.
If he doesn’t want to, he probably doesn’t love you, so why bother?
7. You’re not the only one dealing with this
In this world, there are so many people who were left by their loved ones.
It can even happen on a daily basis! This means that you won’t be the first or the last person who is being left by someone who is very important in your life.
I know that this isn’t the advice you were looking for but it’s the truth. There are so many women who are happy with being alone and who don’t need someone to remind them that they’re beautiful.
8. Do what you can to make the best it
Never let the fear of losing him keep you from showing how much he means to you! Spend time with him and tell him everything you need to to make him feel loved. If he loves you, he will do the same thing for you! This will strengthen your relationship and, even if it comes to an end, you will have wonderful memories to hold on to.
9. Trust in your ability to overcome heartbreak
You are a strong woman who has dealt with many situations where people would leave you and you’re still alive. You overcame all those times someone broke you and you’re still around.
You can overcome anything! If it gets to this point ever again, you need to trust yourself enough to know that you can deal with it and that it’s nothing to be afraid of.
Life goes on and you will need time to heal but it’s going to be worth it!
10. They can never actually leave your life totally
Even if someone you love does leave you, they still live on in your memory and you had an amazing time with them even if they’re not by your side anymore. They are the ones who made you into the person you are today and you need to be thankful that they were there to make your life richer.
5 Sure-fire Ways to Overcome Fear and Anxiety Today
Legend has it that Nasrudin was walking alone at night when he saw a group of people approaching in the far distance.
Instantly, his imagination began to toy with him: “They are surely robbers!” he thought.
“No, why just robbers? Murderers, cutthroats! About to set upon me, a lonely traveller, leave me for dead and steal all my possessions! How are my wife and children going to cope without me?!”
Nasrudin's heart began to pound. His mouth became as dry as his palms became wet. He shook from head to toe and found himself breathing an unfit man running to the finishing line of his first marathon.
Having thoroughly terrified himself, he stumbled into a nearby graveyard and cowered shaking inside an open tomb, awaiting his fate. Meanwhile, the harmless strangers, worried by his dramatic behaviour, approached him and looked with concern down into the tomb. “What, pray, are you doing down there?” they asked.
Nasrudin, calming down quickly, said: “Well, put it this way: I am here because of you and you are here because of me!” (1)
Imagination is a tool to be used, but how many people misuse it to torment themselves? Imagination and emotionality are closely linked and what we imagine can feel very real to us (even when it isn't at all).As the author Katherine Paterson once said: “To fear is one thing. To let fear grab you by the tail and swing you around is another.”
If you find yourself becoming overly anxious, use the following steps to help you calm down and start to regain control.
1) Breathing is the short circuit for anxiety
I know I know, you hear a lot about 'deep breathing' to help you relax and reduce anxiety, but bear with me.
Quicker, shallower breathing is the first trigger which catapults all the other anxious symptoms into action. So by controlling breathing you control all the other anxiety symptoms as well.
If you purposely breathe out longer than you breathe in, your body has to calm right down (regardless of what tricks your imagination is playing on you).
So if you start to feel fearful:
- Focus on your breath
- Take a breath in (to the quick count of 7 in your mind)
- Then slowly breathe out (to the quick count of 11 in your mind)
If you do this for a minute or so, you'll be amazed how quickly you've calmed down. We call this '7/11 breathing' but the numbers are up to you, just as long as the out-breath is longer than the in-breath.
“That's all very well!” I hear you say. “But when I get anxious I forget everything and all good advice goes out the window!”
Good point and well made. This brings us to…
2) Prepare for peaceful performance
If you get anxious and fear upcoming events, you'll notice that just thinking about that interview, speech, or whatever will start to cause physical responses – namely, anxiety.
So you might be thinking about next Wednesday's dental appointment and find yourself breathing more quickly or your palms getting moist. This in turn primes your body to become even more anxious in the actual situation and so the vicious cycle continues. And note the role of the imagination in priming your mind and body to feel fearful (see opening story).
But you're going to find that breathing in a relaxed 7/11 way whilst imagining the upcoming situation ahead of time calms the association down, priming your mind to feel more relaxed naturally and automatically when the actual situation arrives.
So when you find yourself thinking about the future event, do 7/11 breathing.
One symptom of too much fear or anxiety is not being able to think clearly (Nasrudin stumbled into the nearest tomb!). This happens because the emotional part of the brain 'swamps' the thinking part so as to avoid, say, over-analysis getting in the way of running Bejessus from a lion.
But in most modern situations we want to retain clear thought. And keeping your 'thinking brain' working actually calms you right down. The next step helps you do that.
3) Use a different part of your brain
When we become very anxious, it's harder to think clearly. But if we force ourselves to use parts of 'the thinking brain', this will dilute the emotion and begin to calm you down.
The easiest way to do this is with numbers. You can scale your own fear from 1 to 10, 10 being the most terrified it's possible to be and 1 being the ultimate relaxed state.
When you're feeling anxious, ask yourself: “Okay what number on the scale am I right now? Am I a 7, or a 5?” Just doing this will lower anxiety because it kick-starts the thinking brain, diluting the emotion and automatically making you calmer.I recall the first time I gave a speech to three hundred people. Just before I was about to start, I was feeling more anxious than I would have d.
So I scaled myself at a 6, breathed longer out than in for a few moments, and waited for myself to go down to a 3 before starting. I took control.
Scaling (sometimes known as 'grading') your fear puts a 'fence' around it, making it more manageable, and forces you to think.
4) Get control of your imagination
Fear and anxiety thrive when we imagine the worst. We developed imagination to be able to project into the future so we can plan ahead.
However, a side effect of being able to imagine possible positive futures is being able to imagine things going wrong. A bit of this is useful; after all, there really might be muggers or loan sharks.
But uncontrolled imagination is a nesting ground for anxiety and fear that can spoil otherwise happy lives.
Some people misuse their imagination chronically and so suffer much more anxiety than those who either future-project their imaginations constructively or who don't tend to think about the future much at all. Anxious, chronic worriers tend to misuse their imaginations to the extent that upcoming events feel catastrophes waiting to happen. No wonder whole lives can be blighted by fear and anxiety.
Some people don't even really know they are doing this. So:
- Sit down and do your 7/11 breathing.
- Count yourself down from whatever number you deem yourself to be to a 2 or a 1.
- Imagine seeing yourself in the situation you were dreading, but see yourself being calm, composed, cool, and comfortable and things going well. Doing this starts to recondition your mind to feel calmer and more upbeat about upcoming events or regular situations which were causing anxiety.
Or let me do this for you by clicking on the free audio below:
5) Use the AWARE technique
Fear and anxiety can feel as if they 'just happen to us', but we have much more control than we realize. AWARE is an acronym standing for:
A: Accept the anxiety. Don't try to fight it.
W: Watch the anxiety. Just watch it and when you notice it, scale your level of fear and start to breathe longer on the out-breath.
A: Stands for 'Act normally'. Carry on talking or behaving as if nothing is different. This sends a powerful signal to your unconscious mind that its over-dramatic response is actually not needed because nothing that unusual is going on. fire fighters coming out and seeing that no emergency is happening and so going back to the fire station.
R: Repeat the above steps in your mind if necessary.
E: Expect the best. One of the greatest feelings in life is the realization that you can control fear much more than you thought possible.
Overcoming fear and anxiety will give you the 'spare capacity' in life to focus on what you really want to be and do. It takes effort, but imagine the rewards.
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helpful ways to overcome fear of giving birth
You are getting closer and closer to your due date. You are now feeling overwhelmed with the fear of giving birth. Questions “What if I can’t handle the pain?” “Will I be induced?” “What if my doctor is on vacation”? are running through your mind and you just can’t get yourself to calm down. You need to overcome the fear of giving birth, in order for you to actually look forward to that day. But, don’t worry mama, I’m going to help you do just that