Prayer Of A Husband Hurt Through Divorce

The Power of a Praying Husband

Prayer Of A Husband Hurt Through Divorce

“Your wife is an automobile.” That appears to be a strange statement to make, isn’t it? Yes, it is… but it’s also true. Your wife could be a person ( some automobiles) who requires high maintenance. Or perhaps she’s a low maintenance type of marriage partner.

She could be “efficient” and “dependable” or costly—a wife who needs a special amount of attention. But as author Stormie Omartian says, “She needs fuel to make her run smoothly” regardless. Your wife’s spirit needs “gas in her car.

” That’s where you come in as a praying husband.

She could be full right now with the “daily infilling of the Holy Spirit” and with infusions of your love. Or she could be running on empty, and need an extra dose of God’s infilling and your help. No matter what… as her husband, your wife needs you as her marriage partner to pray for her and to love her as God would have you. She needs for you to be her praying husband

To better understand what Stormie Omartian means when she compares your wife to an automobile, plus additional advice she has for you as a praying husband, please read:

• THE POWER OF A PRAYERFUL HUSBAND

You, as a Praying Husband

Stormie Omartian makes another comparison, as it pertains to you as her praying husband. She equates your marriage to be much a football game.

“You and your wife are a team.

And she wants the security of knowing that when things are tough and down to the wire—even when the enemy is already celebrating your demise and all appears to be lost—you have the faith to believe that up to the very last second everything can turn around.

She needs the assurance you have a play in your pocket that can take you down the field with the ball for a possible winning score. She wants you to trust that with God nothing is impossible. And because of that you will never give up hoping for the impossible to happen.”

To learn more, here’s another article to read. It has the same title but different content, which is important to read:

• THE POWER OF A PRAYERFUL HUSBAND

To help you further as a praying husband

The following is something that Stormie’s husband Michael Omartian has written on a husband praying for his wife. After that, you will find a link to a prayer outline, written by “Huz.” Plus, you will find a link to another written prayer, which you can use as an outline as a praying husband, praying on behalf of your wife.

Michael Omartian writes:

“Prayer requires forgetting your own agenda and letting God set the agenda. Many times prayer would focus my attention away from the need to see Stormie change, and become more accommodating to me, to instead change me to be more accommodating to her.

That’s scary stuff for the ego! But through prayer we have been able to make changes and work things out. Now we have been married for 28 years and I can’t imagine anyone else as my mate. But our problems only work themselves out when she and I join with God to solve them.

That threefold cord will not be easily broken.”

Below is a prayer that Michael has used, that you can too, joined with God in:

PRAYER POWER

“Lord, I pray that You would establish in me and (wife’s name) bonds of love that cannot be broken. Show me how to love my wife in an ever-deepening way that she can clearly perceive. May we have mutual respect and admiration for each other so that we become and remain one another’s greatest friend, champion, and unwavering support.

“Where love has been diminished, lost, destroyed, or buried under hurt and disappointment, put it back in our hearts. Give us strength to hold on to the good in our marriage. Help us even in those times when one of us doesn’t feel love.

“Enable my wife and me to forgive each other quickly and completely. Specifically I lift up to You (name any area where forgiveness is needed). Help us to ‘be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving,’ the way You are to us (Ephesians 4:32).

“Teach us to overlook the faults and weaknesses of the other. Give us a sense of humor, especially as we deal with the hard issues of life.

“Unite us in faith, beliefs, standards of morality, and mutual trust. Help us to be of the same mind, to move together in harmony, and to quickly come to mutual agreements about our finances, our children, how we spend our time, and any other decisions that need to be made.

Also:

“Where we are in disagreement and this has caused strife, I pray You would draw us together on the issues. Adjust our perspectives to align with Yours. Make our communication open and honest so that we avoid misunderstandings.

“May we have the grace to be tolerant of each other’s faults and, at the same time, have the willingness to change. I pray that we will not live two separate lives, but will instead walk together as a team. Remind us to take time for one another so that our marriage will be a source of happiness, peace, and joy for us both.

“Lord, I pray that You would protect our marriage from anything that would destroy it. Take our lives anyone who would come between us or tempt us. Help us to immediately recognize and resist temptation when it presents itself.

Furthermore:

“I pray that no other relationship either of us have, or have had in the past, will rob us of anything in our relationship now. Sever all unholy ties in both of our lives.

May there never be any adultery or divorce in our future to destroy what You, Lord, have put together. Help because it has developed a non-working part.

I pray that we will turn to You—the Designer—to fix it and get it operating the way it was intended.

“Teach us to seek each other’s well-being first, as You have commended in Your Word (1 Corinthians 10:24). We want to keep You at the center of our marriage and not expect from each other what only You can give.

“Where either of us have unrealistic expectations of the other, open our eyes to see it. May we never waver in our commitment and devotion to You and to one another, so that this marriage will become all You designed it to be.”

This prayer is found in the book, The Power of a Praying® Husband, written by Stormie Omartian and Michael Omartian. There are additional contributors such as Neil Anderson, Steven Curtis Chapman, Jack Hayford and others.

It is published by Harvest House. “In 20 short, easy-to-read chapters, Stormie Omartian shares how you can intercede for your wife” in prayer.

You’ll also receive “advice and personal stories from well-know Christian men, prayer ideas and words from Scripture.”

– ALSO –

Below you will find additional prayers you can pray for your wife, located at other web site locations. Please click onto the links below to read:

• HOW TO PRAY FOR YOUR MARRIAGE — A User’s Guide

• PRAYER PORTIONS: Praying for Your Wife

• PRAYING FOR YOUR WIFE HEAD TO TOE

If you have additional tips you can share to help others, please “Join the Discussion” by adding your comments below.

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Источник: //marriagemissions.com/the-power-of-a-praying-husband/

7 Good Bible Verses To Help Cope With a Divorce

Prayer Of A Husband Hurt Through Divorce

While divorce is shockingly prevalent in our generation—the pain, discouragement, and abandonment of it still hurts. Many people who are divorced didn’t plan for it or even expect it to ever come to their marriage.

In spite of the fact that God hates divorce, it happened in Moses’ day, Jesus’ day, and our day as well. As believers you must fall into the arms of Jesus Christ through the comfort of His word to cope with a divorce.

Allow these 7 good Bible verses to speak to your heart during this difficult season:

There is hope

“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God” (Psalm 42:5). 

One of the first and most dominant emotions to struggle with in a divorce is utter hopelessness. You’ve made a covenant with God and your spouse in the midst of family and friends to never part—and yet here you are.

Discouragement is Satan’s main weapon against believers in this difficult time. However, there is hope and grace in Christ to make it through the pain of divorce.

Put your hope in God to take care of you spiritually, emotionally, and physically.

… in Christ all things are possible and you can move past divorce towards God’s purpose for your life.

There is peace

“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you” (Isaiah 26:3). 

In the chaos and calamity of divorce, peace will often feel far away. Yet by trusting in the Lord rather than how you feel brings peace in the midst of stormy days.

When you wake up every day with your mind set on God’s goodness—He will get you through it with His perfect peace.

It’s not a one stop shop with peace, it’s an ongoing process of learning to trust in God’s faithfulness through unknown territories of life.

There is joy

“For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning” (Psalm 30:5). 

It seems hard to believe that there can be joy through this devastating experience. Yet the Lord knows how to bring joy alive in your heart during this time.

Your strength to get through this divorce will be rooted in the joy that comes from the Holy Spirit.

While you can’t take away the experience and disappointment of a divorce, through Christ the sting of it will eventually diminish in His presence of joy.

There is comfort

“My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life” (Psalm 119:50). 

In a divorce situation, loneliness can creep into your heart and mind.

Yet it is possible to be alone and not lonely for those who seek their comfort from the Lord and not the empty promises of the world.

The Lord has made many promises to those who love Him and He keeps every last one of them. Search for His promises in the Bible and cling to them all day and night to bring you the comfort you desire.

There is provision

“And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:19). 

For many people divorce can bring financial disaster especially if you weren’t the breadwinner of the family. You could find yourself suddenly having to make major financial decisions in a short period of time.

These are days of seeking wisdom from God to lead you to the right people to help give direction with your finances and finding sustainable income.

The Lord promises to meet all your needs and to not forsake you nor your family.

There is justice

“For we know him who said, ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ and again, ‘The Lord will judge his people.’ It is a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of the living God” (Hebrews 10:30-31). 

There can be great pain for those whose divorce stemmed adultery. It’s difficult enough to figure out the needs of your family and your own personal needs; but to also struggle with the betrayal can be overwhelming.

Yet if you intend to seek revenge instead of trusting God to repay—you will only end up a bitter and disappointed person.

This is a time of casting all your cares on God in order to gain strength so you can forgive the adulterer.

There is a future

“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future’” (Jeremiah 29:11). 

Divorce will feel it’s the end of the world. In many ways, it is the end of a relationship and everything that was promised in it. Yet the Lord is above your divorce and is able to make all grace abound towards you to move forward in faith. Your future isn’t limited or restricted because of a divorce; rather through Christ you have a calling and purpose to fulfill in spite of it.

Coping in Christ

You may feel that you will never get through this divorce. However, in Christ all things are possible and you can move past it towards God’s purpose for your life.

The Lord will never leave nor forsake you in the season of suffering. He will make His presence known to you when you seek after Him with all your heart, soul, and mind.

You will move beyond just coping and begin to live victoriously in Christ.

Related reading for you: Bible Verses About Divorce

Resource – New International Version Bible, The Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright© 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblca, Inc.™ Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

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Источник: //www.whatchristianswanttoknow.com/7-good-bible-verses-to-help-cope-with-a-divorce/

Prayer of a Wife Who Has an Evil Husband

Prayer Of A Husband Hurt Through Divorce

English: A Marriage or Husband and Wife tree. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

At long last!

Prayers this don’t make it into today’s prayer books.  Now we figure that if we have an evil husband, God wants us to divorce them.  Just if you’re attracted to the wrong sex, that means that God really has decided that same-sex marriage pleases Him.

It’s so common for people to think this way that it sounds incredibly rude and heartless to say: Actually, no, God doesn’t want you to divorce your husband just because he’s evil and you’re unhappy.  The reason we think God is always nice and compassionate in such a way that we’re always given whatever we want?

Because we are in an idolatrous society, and we have turned to them instead of them turning to us.  We also have become idolaters.

Even though God loves the fools who live in our society, they are still fools.  It is not loving to tell fools that they aren’t fools.

  You’re a fool if you think God wants you to get a divorce from your husband (or wife) just because they’re evil.  He doesn’t want you to do that.

  He wants you to pray for them and trust Him to help you instead of turning to the false gods of our society that cry out against the truth as “not compassionate.”

God is compassionate: “…Your dear Son Himself has given, and extends His gracious call; to His supper leads us all.  And to this our soul’s salvation, witnesses Your Spirit, Lord/ In Your Sacraments and Word.

/  There He sends true consolation/ Giving us the gift of faith/ That we fear not hell nor death.

”  “True consolation,” see; not the consoling sappy lies by which the dragon lulls you to hell, but the consolation of the Spirit who proclaims that Christ’s propitiatory death under God’s wrath is for sinners with no merit–including you.

But here is the prayer:

used with permission from Stifts- och landsbiblioteket i Skara
//www.flickr.com/photos/63794459@N07/

157. Prayer of a Wife with an Evil Husband

–Johann Quirsfeld, Archdeacon at Pirna (1642-1686).  from his “Geistlicher Myrrhengarten”–“Spiritual Myrrh Garden.”

(Myrrh was an ointment which helped cure wounds; it was also used to preserve and embalm the dead.  So the book is a ‘spiritual medicinal garden’ so to speak.)

Oh merciful God and Father, all-knowing Lord, You know my misery better than I can express it in words or lamenting or complaints.  My spouse, whom at one time You gave to me, is sadly living in an indefensible way, and with him I carry a heavy cross in my house almost every day.

  It is so severe that I don’t know what I should do in such a wretched and sad state of affairs, because Satan, hounding me, makes the holy estate of marriage with my wayward husband exceedingly bitter.

  We cannot separate from one another, because we were joined by you in such a way that nothing but death alone can separate us. 

Now I turn myself to you, Lord my God.  Without Your counsel and will, and without Your permission, nothing can happen.  So I must consider this bad behavior of my spouse a cross made specially for me, for I admit that in other ways before You I have certainly been to blame.  But still give me patience towards it.

  Assist me to bear it with your fatherly hand, rich in love.  Let us not forever live with each other in such disgust, but instead rule the heart of my spouse, that he would become different, and offer himself up as a pious Christian wife is entitled to expect and as is due her.

  Govern the tormenting marriage-demon and other wicked mouths, through which my spouse would often be ensnared.  Plant upright fear of God in his heart, and also honest, wholehearted love toward me, that by it we may from now on live in peace and unity with one another.

  Grant us so to continue in our household affairs and daily bread, that we walk as obedient children according to Your commandments, and that we might be and remain the blessed of the Lord, here in time, and one day, there in eternity.  Amen.

Wedding Sermon: “Your voice is sweet, and your face is lovely”

The joy of marriage is in its trials–Luther

The Joy of Lamentation

Prayer of a Husband with an Evil Wife

God Treats Us So That We Do Not Know What He Will Do With Us–Luther.

Prayer in Great Disgust and Disgrace. Luther.

Prayer About the Hardness of my Heart

Honest Piety: The Difference Between Training and Combat

Short Prayer against the Deadly Arrows of Satan

Thursday Morning Blessing: //deprofundisclamaviadtedomine.wordpress.com/2013/04/04/lutheran-prayer-treasury-thursday-morning-blessing/‎

Unwillingness to Suffer

Источник: //deprofundisclamaviadtedomine.wordpress.com/2012/07/15/prayer-of-a-wife-who-has-an-evil-husband/

A Husband’s Rejection Hurts!

Prayer Of A Husband Hurt Through Divorce

When a husband is emotionally and physically unavailable to his wife she feels rejection, and rejection hurts! Guest blogger and biblical counselor Julie Ganschow counsels, speaks, and trains folks on heart change leading to life change. Here she helps wives discouraged by a husband’s rejection and gives helpful biblical advice. This post first appeared at Julie’s blog at BiblicalCounselingforWomen.org. 

Also, feel free to download our rate-your-marriage quiz. Click here to get it.

I am aware there is a shockingly high percentage of Christian women who are discontent in their marriages because their husband is not emotionally or physically available to them. I have several cases in which the husband refuses to be intimate or give any physical affection to his wife. They live together friends.

This kind of marriage can leave an enormous gaping hole in the life of a woman who wants a biblical marriage. It creates a great deal of discontentment within her.

She doesn’t want a divorce, she doesn’t want to commit adultery; she wants her husband to love her! Most women won’t talk to anyone about their situation because it is too embarrassing to reveal their husband doesn’t want or desire her.

Rejection Leads to Depression and Anxiety

Often, the abandoned wife struggles with feelings of depression because she cannot change her situation. She cannot force her husband to love her! Her emotions are turned inward and over time she may be diagnosed with one of several anxiety disorders or depressive disorders. What I typically find is the women overeats for comfort or under-eats for control.

What do I say to that woman who is discontent for what appears to be a very good and biblical reason? Even in such terrible circumstances as these I must apply the same biblical solutions — I must teach her to look at her own heart.

She has to be willing to admit and repent of any self-pity she indulges in. It is hard to think about being alone in a loveless marriage because her husband does not emotionally connect with her anymore.

Many women really struggle with being angry at their husband for rejecting them and their love. They are
confused and often tell me they cannot figure out what they have done or said to turn him away.

Because she cannot control her husband and make him love her again there are great feelings of hopelessness.

She is lonely and struggles with rejection, shame, and embarrassment. I have had a woman tell me when she attempted to seduce her husband he ridiculed her, laughed at her, and even told her to go put on some clothes! She was devastated. Through her tears she asked me if I knew what is wrong with her that he rejects her that way, that he is so cruel to her now.

other women in this situation, she is full of fear. She is anxious and worries about the reasons he rejects her. She’s always heard men are very sexually oriented, What is the reason he no longer desires her? Her imagination runs away concocting scenarios that are too horrible to dwell upon for long. If he is not interested in her then who is he interested in?

Biblical Solutions to Rejection

Every one of these are common feelings and reactions to being abandoned within marriage, and all must be addressed biblically in the counseling relationship. Gently and compassionately, we must help her discern what her own inner heart issues are, and teach her to see this problem through the lens of Scripture.

If you are biblically counseling a woman in such a situation, you will have to listen closely to what the counselee says to determine where her thoughts, beliefs, and desires are focused.

Is her heart focused on herself or on what God is doing in her as a result of this sad situation? You may need to challenge what she says, and always point her back towards Christ.

When her personal sin in the relationship is exposed, it must be worked through and repented of.

It is critical she understands that even this deep, deep sorrow and all of the aspects of her situation are under the sovereignty of God. As challenging as it will be, she needs to accept that she can become content in her marriage despite the sin of her husband.

Are you discontented in your marriage? Whether you face a husband’s rejection or other marital difficulty, biblical counselors at Biblical Counseling Center will listen to your heart, discern the problem, and walk with you toward God-honoring solutions. Check out our Marriage Challenge or simply contact us. God bless.

Do you or someone you know need counseling? We are passionate about helping hurting people. We provide Skype counseling for people across the country, and live counseling in 5 offices across the Chicagoland area. Get Help Today Are you interested in learning to counsel others? We believe that the Bible has the answers for a hurting world. We are passionate about training people and churches, through online courses and events, to help those in need. Learn More Today

Источник: //biblicalcounselingcenter.org/husbands-rejection-hurts/

Powerful Prayers to Save Your Marriage From Divorce

Prayer Of A Husband Hurt Through Divorce

You made a promise to God and your partner to love and to cherish, ‘till death do you part. Now, maybe you’re wondering if it’s possible to remain together, despite differences, obstacles, or space that has come between you. Your wife is too busy, preoccupied or aloof.

Your husband is too insensitive, disrespectful or passive. Remember, the two of you took vows before God, family, and friends. Those vows remain strong today, but you may need to uncover them again, and pray for help along the way. No matter what has happened in your marriage, God loves you.

He is here for you.

Here are a few powerful prayers that may help you and your significant other rekindle the love in your hearts. These are meant to be prayers for you and your spouse to say together, with the hope of re-connecting and coming together toward a common goal – your marriage.

Pray For Love

Romans 12:10: “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.”

Love. It’s easy to forget in the middle of an argument or the heat of a moment, but it’s what the Bible tells us to do anyway – love. “Be devoted…” in it. And the second part of this prayer may be just as difficult. “Honor one another above yourselves.

” It sounds easy in theory, but in reality, you may feel you are always putting your partner as a priority, and you are the one who is always second. Discuss this with your husband or wife and pray together over this verse. Ask each other what you can do in certain situations to put the other one first.

This might be as easy as giving them the first cup of coffee in the mornings or folding the last load of laundry at night. Or, it may go deeper than that, such as having to forgive.

If you are both trying to save your marriage from divorce, this is a great time to communicate with one another and discuss the best ways for showing each other love.

Pray For Your Marriage

Matthew 19: 4-6: “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”

One flesh. Those two words are very powerful. If you are married, joined together before God, he does not want you to separate. God loves you – BOTH of you. He believes that the two of you, together, are better than apart. In what ways is your life better because of your partner? Discuss these things together and pray over them.

How has your partner enriched your life, and made it better? Do you feel you are a team, operating as one flesh, one body, and one life together? If not, it may be a good time to discuss how you feel you could become more connected, and feel more united, as stated in the Bible.

Are there activities you can do together that will bring you closer, or are there things you’ve put off that you’d to start doing again? Whatever it is, remember that God rejoices in your happiness and your marriage. Pray for no one to separate the special union of you and your partner.

Pray for the Devil not to come between you, but for God to uplift you both and solidify your relationship, making it stronger than ever.

Pray For Strength

Philippians 4:12-13: “I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through Christ who gives me strength.”

This might be one of the hard times…a time of being in need, of being hungry or in want. However, you know you can get through this with the Lord beside you. He knows it is difficult. He knows you are hurting and broken inside.

He realizes that this is not something that you planned nor is it something you ever wanted. You may look around you and see other marriages growing and thriving, while you feel yours is headed towards failure.

It’s important during times these to focus on your own marriage, and not compare. Remember that God provides you with the strength you need to get through anything, and He is there to help you, right now, if you just pray and ask Him.

Take a moment to be with your partner and pray for God’s strength during this trying time in your lives. He will be there for you, if you let Him.

Pray For Faith

Romans 8:18: “The pain that you've been feeling, can't compare to the joy that's coming.”

If you have been discussing the possibility of divorce with your partner, it’s inevitable that you’ve been in pain recently. No married couple ever sees divorce as happening to them, so when the word even begins entering the vocabulary, it can be devastating.

God asks us throughout the Bible to remain faithful, to believe that on the other side of this emptiness and sorrow is a much, much happier place. If you know your marriage can get there, it’s faith that you’re deciding to follow. Faith that will lead you the way you need to go. Acknowledge the hurt but pray for the joy.

Pray for the happier times ahead and along the way, remain faithful to Him.

There are many signs throughout God’s word that He is with us. He is helping you and your partner along this journey, and he won’t leave your side. Pray with your spouse and pray to God. Pray for love, strength, faith, but most of all, pray for your marriage.

Ask Him to bless your relationship and let no one come between you. Ask Him to calm your fears and your desires and to put Him above all else. Ask Him for his wisdom and guidance to help you and your partner.

And most of all, believe that He will be with you both as you navigate this road towards a more loving, faith-filled marriage.

Источник: //www.beliefnet.com/faiths/prayer/powerful-prayers-to-save-your-marriage-from-divorce.aspx

When Your Husband Wants a Divorce – But Won’t Leave

Prayer Of A Husband Hurt Through Divorce

Your husband says he wants the marriage, but he won’t move out. Here are a few steps for wives whose husbands say they want a divorce, but don’t leave.

My first tip for wives whose husbands want to get divorced – but won’t leave the house – is to learn as much as you can about the legalities of separation.

  Books  Divorce: Think Financially, Not Emotionally® : What Women Need To Know About Securing Their Financial Future Before, During, and After Divorce by Jeffrey A.

Landers are priceless – and so is talking to a divorce lawyer in your own city.

In my article about making a life after a divorce, a reader named Jill shared her struggle. Jill’s husband wants to divorce her, but he refuses to leave the house and kids. He wants her to leave – he has nowhere to go, no friends to stay with, and no family to rely on.

She wants to go to counseling and perhaps even save their marriage, but he refuses. Jill doesn’t know what to do – she feels stuck, anxious, isolated, and scared for her kids. Not to mention unloved, betrayed, and confused.

When did her husband stop loving her? Why? He’s not having an affair, he’s not gay, he’s not any different than the man she married 20 years ago.

If you’re in the same boat, you’re not alone.

When Your Husband Wants a Divorce – But Won’t Leave

Getting in-person advice from a divorce attorney or lawyer who specializes in mediation is crucial. Don’t rely on the internet for tips on how to deal when your husband wants a divorce. Every situation is different, and you need to get advice that is specific to you.

Talk to a divorce lawyer

Before you take any drastic steps – such as leaving your home because your husband won’t – talk to an attorney! I’m not a lawyer – my tips are creating a better, happier life. This is not legal advice.

Jill refuses to talk to a divorce lawyer, because she’s scared. Calling a lawyer makes the whole situation more “real”, and will force her to move forward. She’s not ready, even though her husband has repeatedly told her he wants a divorce and that she has to leave the house.

But, part of getting over the pain of an unexpected divorce is taking action – even when it hurts.

Take care of your physical, emotional, and spiritual health

Jill’s way to cope with her situation is not to eat. She’s not sleeping, either – and she feels exhausted, stressed, sad, and lethargic. Other wives whose husbands want to leave them may turn to food for comfort, pills to zone out, or shopping to escape. While these coping mechanisms may seem they’re helping, they’re doing a great deal of damage in the long run.

If you’re unhealthy, you can’t think clearly. If you can’t think clearly, you won’t make the best decisions for you, your children, and your finances. It’s really difficult to stay healthy when your husband wants a divorce and won’t leave the house – but it’s vital that you take care of yourself.

And, start thinking about how to let go. My most popular article has always been Letting Go of Someone You Love – Freedom From the Past.

Write down everything that happens

What date did your husband first tell you he wants a divorce, but doesn’t want to leave the house? Who have you confided in? When did you call a divorce lawyer? Have you tried marriage counseling – if so, who did you contact? How much money do you have in your joint accounts? What transactions have occurred recently?

The more details you have, the better off you’ll be. You never know when those details – even the seemingly inane ones – will make the difference between making or breaking a custody battle.

Consider making the first move

Jill has been stuck with an unhappy, unmoving husband for five months. Neither of them know what to do: he wants her to leave her home and children, and she wants to save their marriage.

She feels she’s starting to lose her mind, and thinks she’s close to a nervous breakdown. They sleep in the same bed but aren’t intimate. Her husband says he loves her one day, and denies it the next.

She feels he’s driving her crazy.

I think Jill should take her kids and leave her husband – but first she needs to talk to a divorce lawyer! Do not leave the house without talking to an attorney first. The reason I think Jill should make the first move is because her health is deteriorating and she feels she’s losing her mind.

I’m not telling you to take your kids and leave the house. If your husband wants a divorce but won’t leave your home, you need to seek professional, legal advice. But I do think that sometimes you have to make sacrifices to start rebuilding your life and moving on.

You may find Thinking About Divorce? Options for Unhappy Married Couples helpful.

Be prepared to make sacrifices

“When Your Husband Wants a Divorce – But Won’t Leave” image by teresa_lynn via DeviantArt

Why should Jill leave her house? It’s not fair! HE’S the one who wants a divorce. HE’S the one who is ruining their 20-year old marriage. Why should she have to uproot her life and children, just because her husband has suddenly decided he wants the marriage?

The thing is, it’s not about what’s fair, right, or how things “should” be. It’s about knowing when enough is enough. Sometimes you have to just pick up the pieces of your shattered marriage, and move on.

You need to rebuild your life – and it won’t be as neat and clean as your husband suddenly decided that he wants to stay married, or that he should be the one to leave the house because he’s the one who wants a divorce.

I think that if a man wants a divorce, he should have the balls to walk away. But some men are too weak, indecisive, stubborn, and selfish to do more than say, “I want to end our marriage – so you have to leave the house.” So, it’s up to Jill to screw up her courage and start moving forward…even if it means making huge sacrifices.

Sometimes you have to take care of your future self – and that means making painful decisions right now.

Start looking ahead – because good things ARE waiting for you!

I know how bleak life seems right now. It’s awful, painful, shameful, embarrassing, and terrible that your husband wants a divorce. It’s a nightmare come true, and you didn’t do anything wrong. You don’t deserve to be treated this.

While you’re going through this, try to give yourself glimpses of a happier, brighter future. Remember that there was something wrong with your marriage or husband – otherwise he wouldn’t want a divorce. Remember that millions of women have survived divorce and are now thriving, happy, and fulfilled. Some wives don’t even realize how unhappy they were, until their husbands left.

If you’re a believer, read How to Survive a Christian Divorce.

What do you think – what would you do if your husband wanted a divorce but won’t leave your home? I welcome your experiences on dealing with divorce, but I can’t offer advice or counseling.

May God’s peace rest on you, and show you the way.

Источник: //www.theadventurouswriter.com/quipstipsrelationships/husband-wants-divorce-wont-leave-house/

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